Blood and Pith and Rock

Right now I sit atop an enormous ass zit, a bloated ball of swollen and hate. My face is full. My lips push outward from the puffiness and my chin is dangling in my lap. My skin feels like that of an overfilled water balloon and I can barely type around my boobs.

The cramps aren’t here yet. I am bracing for those through gritted teeth and quick-ready tears.

This morning I woke up to the prospect of dragging all my laundry to the laundromat and felt instantly suicidal. The VCB urged that we should go–hell, he’d even do all the laundry–if only because he’s down to his last pair of underwear.* The self-imposed, two-hour guilt trip that would come with his doing my laundry would eat me inside out, so I just whined and pouted and stared at the ceiling as he patiently tried to work something out for us. And for his soon-to-be unclothed bum.

I cried. I said things like, “I want to punch you in the face. A bunch of times.” I decided on screaming for as loud as I could for as long as I could, but decided getting arrested might not be the best way to overcome my irritability. But I was tempted. I was oh so close.

It’s CRAZY how crazy I get three days a month. Maaaan. I feel like I talk about it all the time here on the weblog, but fuck! Sometimes I just have to bitch and scream and if I have a couple hundred people to sound off to then I feel somehow justified in all my senseless ranting. Not that I care what any of you assholes think right now.**

Speaking of assholes. Certain people are using the comments atattched to each post to harrass and belittle me, offering up advice on how to better my writing when I don’t remember having asked what they thought. I think some posts on this weblog generate intelligent, funny and often engaging discussion, and for those posts comments will remain open. However on other shorter posts, or the ficiton posts, or on more personal essay-type stuff I think it’s wise to leave the comments closed. I welcome openly valid critcisms and ideas and the like, but perhaps if your criticism is solely negative then that (unsolicited) critique might be better suited for email. Or not at all. Posts like this one though where I’m basically letter writing to the reader will definitely have comments open and I encourage them wholeheartedly. Just tightening things up before they get out of hand and I have to start issuing some fucking beatings. The VCB saw my fists of fury this morning (see below) and he can attest they are quick, precise and mighty.

Tonight I will be taking my cans of food to MTSU to see my buddies Jay and Mike (of Apollo Up) and Jeremy (of Mercator) play a fancy-pants gig with Matt Sharp. I’m going to bring my camera along if the big rockin’ stars allow it and maybe kick another photo gallery over there on the left.

The VCB will be back soon from buying new underwear and some lunch. And if he’s smart some head gear.

*Sorry to talk about your panties, sweetie, on the blog. It was write honestly or resume punching that pillow, and since I jumped the gun last time and nearly socked your pretty nose, perhaps it’s best I hash out my emotions in this manner. I thought you’d understand.

**I kid, I kid. Though, honestly, I’d like you more if you were in front of me with a Valium and some chocolate.

11 comments ↓

#1 For Rent on 11.23.03 at 10:24 pm

Publishing work for public consumption means you ARE asking people what they thought. I mean, duh?

I would suggest holding off on closing down the comments. I doubt thats what you really want. You may have a different opinion on it 4 days from now.

I would assume you get more warm fuzzies from the cheerleaders than you do bad vibes from the detractors. But maybe that isn’t the case.

But to say you are not soliciting others’ opinions is simply being disingenuous. Every writer that discloses their writings is doing just that, ipso facto.

#2 John on 11.23.03 at 11:19 pm

You did not just say “ipso facto.”

#3 sabre-toothed librarian on 11.23.03 at 11:29 pm

regarding For Rent:
I think there is a big difference between publishing a work for consumption and publishing for conversation and critique. Consumption is pretty one-sided: I write, you read.
I like that weblogs and comments and trackback and shit like that are great tools for writing about writing and discussing topics raised by the author. I’ve met some cool people this way.
But wanting people to read your work and wanting people to critique your work are different. That’s why writing workshops exist. That’s why there isn’t a Postage-Paid Suggestion card in the back of that paperback you just bought.
And your suggestion that “I doubt thats what you really want.” shows the condesending tone that is typical of most unsolicited criticism. Also, I think that if you read a writer write that they sometimes don’t want others’ opinions, and if you come away from that with the opinion that they don’t want what they say they want, then you are not only an overly critical reader, but a poor reader.

#4 For Rent on 11.24.03 at 12:14 am

Librarian:

Everything one reads is instantly critiqued by the reader. Suggesting otherwise is absurd. There is no such thing as “for consumption only”. Musicians are not allowed to record a song, put it on the radio, then kindly ask people not to say anything about it. Well they can, but noone would comply.

Every public presentation of art, music, or writing invites both praise and criticism by the very fact of its existence.

The example I often use is, I would not come up to your house and eavesdrop on you singing privately, then knock on your door and offer criticism. Once you record a CD or perform on a stage, you are implicitly allowing, I would go so far as inviting, the possibility of criticism.

Using your example, there *IS* a postage-paid card attached to weblogs, it’s called “comments”. It’s not generally called “positive comments” or “praise”.

And you read too much into my statement about “I don’t think that’s what you really want.”. It means precisely what it says, nothing more. Would it have been more palatable if I had said “I am of the opinion that lack of comments is not truly what you are desiring for the response section of your site”? A little reactionary on your part, I think. Talk about being an overly critical reader.

I’m not sure how voicing my opinion immediately makes me condescending.

I guess I’m just not buying into the whole “I’m going to put things up on a public, unrestricted weblog and attach comment ability to my posts in the hope that noone comments critically on the work”.

I think Brittney is a big enough girl and a strong enough writer to withstand less-than-raving comments and field her own criticisms, don’t you?

#5 For Rent on 11.24.03 at 12:22 am

For reference, please see Brittney’s absolutely scathing review of “How to lose a guy in 10 days”:

http://www.nashvillescene.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?story=Back_Issues:2003:February_27-March_5_2003:Arts:Losing_Bet

I somehow doubt the director specifically asked Brittney to offer up her opinion, perhaps he offered the movie as “for consumption only”, but she certainly had no problems giving her opinion. In a public forum no less.

See what I mean? This is how public presentation works.

#6 John on 11.24.03 at 12:55 am

It’s her weblog; she controls the comments. It’s her decision, not yours. End of story.

The movie review was published by Nashville Scene, not by Paramount. Creators aren’t obligated to accept or publish criticism. You have the right to say whatever you want, but that doesn’t mean anyone will care. You can’t force someone to publish your comments, especially when you’re being critical of the publisher.

#7 brittney on 11.24.03 at 12:55 am

There are appropriate venues for criticism and there are inappropriate ones. I did not stand up in the middle of the theatre and annouce to everyone what a shitty movie “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days” is. Instead, I wrote a review which was published in the “Reviews” section of the newspaper.

You are correct that comments act as instantaneous feedback. Which is precisely why I will not open them on posts for which I prefer private feedback. Make no mistake: I encourage valid criticisms and feedback. However, I have noticed that some people who comment, yourself included, make nothing *but* negative remarks.

I am more than capable of defending myself, about that you are correct.

This is MY weblog, you see. I pay for it. I decide what it looks like, what it says, who comments. Those are the facts. I can’t control who reads it, nor do I want to, but if those who wish to comment can’t be bothered to type up an email, I doubt it was too important.

Weblogs are a unique medium for many, many reasons. Some control over the type of feedback you recieve and the ease with which it is sent are aspects of weblogging not at all simliar to other mediums like books or magazines.

#8 AD on 11.24.03 at 7:51 am

Rent,

No link to your weblog? I would love to criticize your writing.

Thanks.

#9 mikro on 11.25.03 at 3:58 pm

Publishing work for public consumption means you ARE asking people what they thought.

Verb tense disagreement. Either “means you are asking people what they think” or “meant that you were asking people what they thought” would be acceptable.

I mean, duh?

Trite. Suggests that you think your audience is an idiot, or that you yourself are one.

I doubt thats what you really want.

Ambiguous, poor punctuation. Either “I doubt that that’s what you really want” or “I doubt it’s what you really want” would be preferable.

Would it have been more palatable if I had said “I am of the opinion that lack of comments is not truly what you are desiring for the response section of your site”?

This is merely a rewording of your previous statement. It in no way changes the implied meaning of the original comment, that you know the author’s thoughts and wishes better than she does.

I guess I’m just not buying into the whole “I’m going to put things up on a public, unrestricted weblog and attach comment ability to my posts in the hope that noone comments critically on the work”.

Sentence fragment. The whole “I’m going to put things up on a public, unrestricted weblog and attach comment ability to my posts in the hope that noone comments critically on the work” what?

In a public forum no less.

Sentence fragment.

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