So, some Craig went ego surfing and stumbled upon my post about Stinky Craig. Who! by the way, was recently hired back by the valet company. I think the one Stinky Craig works for has a monopoly on the industry in Nashville; I’ve never seen any valets anywhere who work for anyone else. They should have their pick of people…and they go and hire Craig back.
ANYWAY. Some Craig discovered the post, which led him to discover that I have a distaste for all things Craig, as is stated in the first few lines. You see, I don’t have an actual problem with the race of Craigs out there, it’s just that I don’t have a fondness for them either. I am more than certain there is a perfectly nice, totally charming Craig out there reading this right now. Well, reading the internet at least. And I’m sure he is nice to his pretty wife, and makes jokes everyone laughs at, but I’ve never met such a Craig.
And the Craig that found my site is no exception. Be sure to check out the comment by Craig in this post and then the comment following his by his buddy, scott. Who, apparently, lives with Craig since they share the same IP number. He uses the words “tird” and “fair dinkum” and “anal.” He says that one twice.
Anyway, I just wanted to thank Craig. For reaffirming my belief in my ridiculous claim that all Craigs are kind of special. You made my day.
P.S. Not into the anal.
P.P.S. Yet.
14 comments ↓
They can’t even spell…
I only knew one Craig. He was a very socially awkward dude. Trapped in a relationship with a socially awkward aaaand bossy lass. And trapped by a need to be perfect in the eyes of God. Wouldn’t wittingly offend a soul, but as such, unwitingly offended many.
I hereby bask in the glow of Coryness. (and take pride that no five letters in my full name spell Craig either–no “g”)
Get it? Ummmm… nope.
As i understand it, Shelton bailed himself out both times, so he should be… well, out. But he is sort of depressed, really, and sometimes he just ignores his phone when it rings. It happens.
Craig’s attempt at insulting you is…. wow, that’s the funniest thing I’ve read in a loooong time. Why can’t anyone ever spell “turd?” Tird. That’s ridiculous. That’s worse than my pal who spelled it “terd” and refused to believe that he’d been misspelling it for years.
That was one sorry Bass turd. He obviously has no idea what it means to be retarted. Once, in Hollywood, I met this tart, and she tarted me. But I ran out of money, and she refused to retart me because I was broke. So I’ve never been retarted. But I woulda been if I coulda been.
Speaking for all the Cap-S-Scotts in the world, I hereby apologize for the loutish behavior of our bastard cousin all-lower-case-scott. We found him sleeping behind the 7-11 one night and took him in because we felt sorry for him. We had to let him go, however, because he kept pissing on the carpet. Since then he’s been cruising the ‘net with his boyfriend Craig seeing how many times they can use the word “anal” in peoples’ blogs. If I had it all to do over again, I’d have taken him to the shelter, where after a reasonable adoption window he’d have been put out of his lonely misery.
That’s hilarious. I’ve known two Craigs, one of whom was actually not bad (but that was in the 6th grade so he’s probably some lobotomized nazi by now), but you can’t pay for this kind of entertainment.
yah, what Not Craig sed. dont these people know that actin like a idiet onyl reinforces your preordained negative stereotype of what being a Craig iz all about?
like duh!
I don’t know any real life Craigs, but the Craig on Degrassi: The Next Generation cheated on his girlfriend with a 14-year-old, whom he both deflowered and impregnated in one go. Then he tried to get her to keep the baby when she wanted to have an abortion.
So it’s like even the TV knows about the Craigs.
My boss’s husband is named Craig. I have to tuck in my shirt and take my eyebrow piercing out every time he comes to visit work. It makes me nervous to be around him because I know he’s thinking about telling his wife to tell me to cut my fucking hair again. But all-in-all he’s not a bad bloke.
I have to disagree. I dive with a Craig who’s non-stinky and non-douchebag-y, and on the one occasion I had a dual reg failure at 80′ he shared his air, enabling me to get to the surface and not die. So I have to stand up like in defense of at least some Craigs.
I also have a friend whose last name is Craig, and he will give you his last beer or last smoke or last swig of Black Bush. So he’s okay too.
I dated a Craig. I hear he went gay.
Fan of Craig, not I.
I thoroughly enjoyed the *Art of Slow Reading* link over there in the Itty-Bitty Blog. Its much like the difference between sympathy and empathy.
Oh yeah, and Craigs suck. (Except for that one dude who makes those lists)
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