Two Showers On Monday Morning

I toted a big 42 ounce bottle of sparking water, lemon flavored, with me to work today in my bag. I walked the ten blocks from BART, stopping at the Embarcadero Center post office to buy stamps. The stamp buying stop was a bust because the line was 12 people long and the machine only took exact change. I actually had $8.20 in cash for a book of “forever” stamps, so I pulled out a five, three ones and 2 dimes and started plugging them in the machine. Turns out by exact change they meant precisely that. The bill accepter didn’t even attempt to accept my dollars. I had to leave the post office stampless. I had to hurry to work since the stop took longer than anticipated. I got to my desk thirsty, so I opened the sparkling water only to get blasted in the face and chest with carbonated beverage. Mineral water rained down off my phone and monitor. It looked like a stunt for a sitcom; the water went everywhere. I feel extra awake now and lemony fresh.